So, eleven years ago, when I first began to suspect I was grey-asexual
, I posted about my asexual character Merrick
at the main asexual forum.
It didn't go well. http://www.asexuality.org/en/topic/20059-life-prison-fantasy-story-w-asexual-character/
Rereading that thread, I'm not sure why I writhed from the comments, except that . . . Well, read on.
So I mostly avoided the asexual community from then on. Fast forward to 2017, when yes, I'm sure now that I'm grey-asexual. So I got up my courage and mentioned Merrick to another asexual person.
It didn't go well. https://mobile.twitter.com/duskpeterson/status/911342888272912384
Afterwards, I tried to beat back my tears by reciting to myself the valuable mantra, "It's not about you. It's not about you. You're the one who offended, so don't make this about you."
Still . . .
I wish I wasn't so darned sensitive during the coming-out stage. I went through this when I came out as bi, I went through this when I came out as nonbinary, and now I have to go through it *again*, this feeling that I'm not a proper [insert category] till I've been welcomed into the [insert category] community. (This isn't pure paranoia. My nonbinary coming-out experience in the gay/lesbian/bi community and trans community was a horror story.) And so, if I encounter even the slightest sign that I'm not 100% accepted, I curl up into a ball and whimper.
So basically, I could use a few "Yay, you're asexual!" comments from you kind folks.